Be Your Own Dang Disney Princess
There were a lot of Disney movies we were not allowed to watch growing up. Snow White was a giant NOPE in our home. At the time, I couldn’t figure out why the heck it was such a big deal and just thought my parents were being legalistic. And now that I have kids of my own, I totally get it. Caillou is FOREVER BANNED from the Todryk home. FOREVER BANNED! So, we would watch Disney movies at friends’ sleep-overs, or hide the VHS tapes from my dad to watch them while he was at work. Sorry dad!
I remember being completely enthralled by Cinderella specifically. I would absorb every scene, the gown, the crown, the glass slipper and like most little girls, imagine it was me in that beautiful dress. I loved watching all the princess movies. ALL OF THEM.
Let’s rewind for a second though. If I haven’t told you yet, my name is Jess and I am the middle child of 3. My dad is from the Bahamas and my mom is Italian. And for those of you who appreciate color theory like I do…when you mix dark brown and white, you get a beautiful caramel color. Enter Jason, Jessica and Julie Forbes.
The only problem was, circa 1991 up until like, 2010 …I did not see my caramel color as something beautiful. I found it to be…different. Different than what the kids looked like at school. Different hair texture. Different nose shape. Just all around, different. I will save the “biracial identity issues” for another blog post. But I knew I was different and I felt it to my core. It’s also why I worked so incredibly hard my whole life to be accepted and liked by people. Biracial and a type 3 enneagram - yikes, am I right?!
Anyways, back to Disney. I remember watching Cinderella and so badly wanting to connect with her. I’d watch movie after movie and hold out on hope that maybe one day I could be just like her. Though I loved watching all the Disney movies, I would find myself feeling bummed out afterward. It specifically hit me hard that one time I tried to run a fork through my kinky-coily (tangled) hair after watching The Little Mermaid. Yall, it took an act of God to get that dang fork out of my head. I do not recommend trying that by the way - no matter what hair texture you have! Trying to get that fork out of my hair was another harsh reminder that I was different. In retrospect, I wish I could go back and talk to someone about how I felt. I’m sure someone would have given me the truth that at the end of the day we are all human and that is the glue that connects us. Instead, I let Disney tell me who I was not.
Now let me pause to say I do not believe all kids are as hyper aware as I was at that age. Maybe some kids were, but I don’t believe it’s that serious for many…unless you were different. There were no black or biracial Disney princesses I could relate to growing up. Is that Disney’s fault that I didn’t get what I needed as a child from a movie? Absolutely not! But I know I have some sisters reading this who might also have felt unseen as a kid and wish they were represented in something so magical like Disney. I bet if a little disabled girl saw a princess character, she would not feel so alone. Again, hear me… i’m not coming for Disney and I am also not calling anyone to be or stay a victim! I just think it’s an interesting observation and worth the conversation.
I am however calling out my sisters who have felt unseen their whole lives to speak up, heal and BE your own princess! We get to invent ourselves and stand on the truth that our Father is a KING! How awesome is that!?
Maybe you were bullied growing up. Maybe you had special abilities, a handicap or you were chronically sick as a kid. Maybe you lived in poverty and it was obvious. Were you the the unpopular girl? The super thin or heavier set girl? The girl who’s parents took their anger out on verbally or physically? Fill in the blank of whatever the world told you you were not and let’s create our OWN princess within ourselves! No one can make you feel less than without your permission and God has already decided that you are his Daughter. The daughter of a KING! So today we will show up as exactly that!
I’m a Jesus-loving, mixed race woman who will use her voice to speak truth, love and coach others to live life to their fullest potential.
I am a princess, and so are you sis!